Jun 13 2008
It’s Not Considered Stealing Unless You’re Getting Caught
I hate when people say speeding doesn’t get you where you going any faster. If you want to get somewhere before someone, you try to move quicker than them. The whole concept of a race is based on the idea that the person moving faster will win. Speeding gets you there quicker.
Which of the following three things did I really see on my way to work yesterday:
A homeless man wearing short blue shorts and a green Starbucks apron…nothing else.
A person order a “large pizza soup.”
A little boy on the 1 train platform at 34th Street drop his red lollipop on the floor, pick it and put it back in his mouth.
Fox News Channel identified Barack Obama’s wife as “Barack’s Babys Mama” on a news program yesterday. What the fuck were they thinking? First of all, it is really racist. Also, if I understand the term correctly, it is meant to identify a woman that a man had a child with but has not married . Am I wrong in assuming that? Later in the broadcast, they called Obama “boy” and “son.” They also claimed that 67% of black people on Earth today were born on Saturn.
My sister bought Honey Nut Cherrios the other day and we were talking about how they used to put prizes in cereal. She babysits these two little kids in Scarsdale (They actually live on the same street that Jay Z and Beyonce just bought house on) and she said that cereal never comes with toys in it anymore. She said the kids don’t even realize that there was ever a time when it did. What a crock of shit, you know? It was always cool to know that even though you’re were going to have to go school in a few minutes, you could get some little thing to screw around with at the kitchen table. You can’t have anything nice anymore, you know? I blame the media.
This morning on the Today Show, Tiki Barber made a joke about being a barber in his spare time. So he basically stole one of Tony’s worst jokes of all time.
There is a 107 year old man that is going to lead some parade in Andover, Mass. He once turned down a job offer from Thomas Edison (I guess he isn’t the brightest bulb in the drawer, huh? Am I right? You in the back, you get it? Sure you do.). Anyway, I have no doubt that this parade is going to be the slowest moving parade of all time.
i think its the lollipop, for sure.
i also think thr protest is messed up.
Racism is mad racist, but it never goes away and sometimes you just gotta go wit da flow. Peace out. I also think it is the lollipop. Peace out.
Man, sometimes I leave a comment and it doesn’t get posted.
I think it was the lollipop.
Pete, Sean here, don’t worry if you post a comment and it isn’t there right away…it’ll get there.
FYI…it was the homeless dude wearing the Starbuck’s apron…I knew ya’ll would fall for the lollipop one because it was do detailed. Thanks for guessing.
Nah kid. I left comments before that have never posted, I just checked. It’s no big deal but I think that you should know that you need to start fuckin firing people.
Stevie, what did Tony say to that kid?
Tony called him Vijay Singh.
i just had a box of cheerios come with a speed racer little car. the toys are still around
Tom, you live in LA…that doesn’t count, bro.