Oct 13 2008
Facebook the Facts
I didn’t think I’d like Facebook. I haven’t been on Myspace for awhile and I just kind of assumed Facebook was just like Myspace. Boy was I wrong! If you asked me a few weeks ago if I would care about a social network that allowed me to find out that a girl I went to grade school with is apple picking with her three kids or someone that I went to College with is upset about the economy, I’d smack your mouth. But I fucking love it!
People posting pictures of their friends babies or sending little treats to friends, you know? It all adds up to a good time. Not only do you get to see what other people are doing, they also allow you to view what people are saying on your friends pages! It’s like talking to people you don’t really talk to without all the awkward pauses!
It also reminds me of how you can be walking down the street and overhear someone say something like, “Look, there are reasons they sell KY Jelly…”and because it is socially unaccepted to stop and listen you’ll never the rest of that story. Facebook allows you to get all the facts. It should be called Factbook. Actually, I’ll start a social network called Factbook. Don’t steal it, dickheads.
There was a story in the Daily News a week or so ago about another classical musician leaving his or her (alot of these classical types have wacky names and you just never know) instrument behind in a cab. I feel like this happens way too often. Hey Mozart, get your head out of the clouds and cut the shit. These cab drivers always return the instrument because they don’t fucking know. What are they going to do, see if any of the fellas back at shop are in the market for a Giovellia? No, there is just no way to sell one of those things on the street. So the story always goes that the driver hangs on to the instrument until Wagner, Jr. gets someone to dial a phone for them and have a conversation with another human being without breaking out into hives. He or she gets the instrument back and the world keeps on spinning. Next time sI say the cab driver get to smash the instrument in the street. Teach these bastards the world does not stop and start at their convenience.
